What is counselling?
Counselling is a form of talking therapy. It aims to relieve distress and help you heal by talking about your issues with someone. By talking about things, you can find new ways of seeing your life, and work out solutions that are right for you.
There are lots of types of counselling, such as CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), Psychodynamic therapy (based on Freud’s theories) and my own Humanistic approach. If you want to get into the technical details, the mental health charity Mind have a lot of information.
Can counselling help me?
The NHS recommends counselling as a treatment for mental health issues, difficult life events, and learning to cope with injuries and difficult emotions. If you’re not sure if counselling would be useful to you, I’d be happy to discuss possible options with you.
One of the most important parts of counselling is that you need to be a part of the work: counselling isn’t something that can be ‘done to you’, you need to be engaged in the process. It’s most effective when you have the bravery to challenge yourself. You don’t need to commit to coming for a long time, but you’ll find it much more useful to you when you really turn up for each session.
How much counselling should I have?
There isn’t really a simple answer to that. People are different, and everyone’s issues are different. There isn’t a set number of sessions that I recommend for any issue. Some people might just come for a few sessions, some might come regularly for years. More sessions allow for a broader scope, so if you have a very specific dilemma a few sessions might be just fine for you, or you might want a much longer time to explore wider issues.
You might want to say ‘I want a certain number of sessions’ when you start, or you might want to just carry on as long as feels right.
I make a point of reviewing our progress during sessions, so we can both get a better feel for how well the process is working for you. You might want to change how we approach sessions, or decide it’s time to move on. It’s best if we know we’re going to stop a few sessions before we do it, in order to figure out your next steps.
How do I choose the right counsellor?
Research has shown that the relationship between client and counsellor is the most important factor in how well counselling works (more than the approach they use!) So you need to get on with your counsellor. If your budget allows it, I’d really recommend trying an intro session with a few different people and see who you click with. But even if that’s not an option, it’s worth bearing in mind with whoever you choose – you might need to try a few before you find the right match.
I’d say go with your gut. If you’re looking at someone’s website and you like the feel of it, you’ll probably like the person who made it. If it rubs you the wrong way, there are lots more counsellors out there!